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好朋友在背后说我坏话,被我知道后……

1e2549faff28f81d373910902c568983

01MDAwMDAwMDAwMHp9js-PtriZgbB3q7KKhZ2xy8ei

IzViYTU5MzEzNWNjOTY=

前几天MDAwMDAwMDAwMH6Qgs6Ets7egYp_Yr53n528yKGi,学姐在上班路上遇到了断交3年的“朋友”MDAwMDAwMDAwMHqjjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKiGe9tbWi,见到她的那一刻3209470f52d49473dc1bf41b4508df63,学姐的心情就像过山车一样起伏不定3eae9a8aad7dd747b13598b5b261573a23411c71e27c02e33fa65ccf6b7dde69

MDAwMDAwMDAwMHujjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKhZ28y62i

这位“好朋友”MDAwMDAwMDAwMHqNjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKiGiwtc-i,暂时叫她TT吧MDAwMDAwMDAwMIF9js-PtriZgbB3q7KKjGaxtcuic76c81b75d847a890fa0ca66b2778716

c00033b1471ace984dfc2d99eac92a6182ee5789

TT和学姐是大学同学MDAwMDAwMDAwMHqjjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKiGiw262i,毕业后进了同一家公司MDAwMDAwMDAwMHp9js-PtriZgbB3q7KKiGixtaWi,之后一起合租过一年房子MDAwMDAwMDAwMH6Qgs6Ets7egYp_Yr6HmmaxsqGi。那个时候MDAwMDAwMDAwMHmzjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKiGixzrWi,死党、家人都不在身边9a527c62280dc23520ea46114a200dc00eca60c3,TT是学姐唯一愿意掏心掏肺的人04310d3bd994a46201df47d584bb3f6f。当时34cce096b365e6c97d595e61917c87b2,我以为我们可以当一辈子朋友MDAwMDAwMDAwMH6Qgs6Ets7egYp_Yr53o5yysqGi,却没想过c71963cbf58399428d8f10860d156bc1a8e0a33e,TT会对我做出那样的事......MDAwMDAwMDAwMIF9js-PtriZgbB3q7KKhZ6wy8ei

QDViYTU5MzEzNWNkNWE=

b84293a61e1744071f621099dc5c58faada1ee5e

436984424834376f0dc4de12250b4757dc2ca5d1

 c7c4f6fc56044181a83a314148ba270297c4ef18

459626a9fc744b0e6a3b6efed846b838

那是工作后的第一年b46740e4a55d601208dfb7ec5587ff771889435c。上级向学姐透露升职的事6cb93b69c9a07e2efb8511a8dfc5be59c7e88719,可后来不知为什么ITViYTU5MzEzNWRhMTU=,升上去的却是其他人2ee7281273f727943fbba174b0b19d7fMDAwMDAwMDAwMIF9js-PtriZgbB3q7KKhZ68262i

d4c7003e708fa9ffd7304ab96980631e

一段时间后2eea14f54af2ec14702087af2b40991b,有同事悄悄告诉学姐9d5381d9e336e98fb4bb0cef6e14b18c,TT其实一直在背后说学姐偷懒XjViYTU5MzEzNWRhNjc=,不好好工作4d1879be769a54d210d852f2667e3e2b553925ca,还不愿意加班之类NWJhNTkzMTM1ZTdmNA==。这些流言很快传进领导耳朵里e99615d76951bd933af86393da71b83d,领导觉得学姐不可靠KjViYTU5MzEzNWRhYmI=,就换了人NWJhNTkzMTM1ZTgxNg==。可实际上MDAwMDAwMDAwMIijjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKiZu8zrmi,学姐当时私下对TT说的是MDAwMDAwMDAwMHujjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKiZu9qK2i,上班期间要努力提高工作效率6dd0babd24004ff964521900f76eb99e,尽量准时下班!6ac07b6e0e15c46dc79730cb8c2f24cca7adbf9c

MDAwMDAwMDAwMHmzjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKhZ-wtbWi

学姐去找TT求证IzViYTU5MzEzNWRiMjU=,结果正好撞上她在同事面前贬低学姐451608a73f332011a26e76769baf5ab1。学姐没忍住MDAwMDAwMDAwMHp9js-PtriZgbB3q7KKiZywy8ui,跟TT撕了一场dba748ac0c64396d41eea3dc58e44487d661abde。撕完之后MDAwMDAwMDAwMHp9js-PtriZgbB3q7KKiZywk72i,学姐没觉得畅快MDAwMDAwMDAwMHqNjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKiZyxtcei,反而哭了很久MDAwMDAwMDAwMHmNjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKjGextaWi。后来345c54d0f9054cbe0f42b3d0a420b757e51963b9,学姐搬了家d55f18846173b03511a60797d3969d4b,跟TT彻底断了联系MDAwMDAwMDAwMHmzjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKjGexzrWi6bf6127c277140f11d8231666d4341e799eff12a

4aa22b01b317360044056b447f5129cf

之后NWJhNTkzMTM1ZGJiZA==,学姐和别人相处的时候IzViYTU5MzEzNWRiZGI=,会经常想起TT做过的事MDAwMDAwMDAwMH6Qgs6Ets7egYp_Yr56gZ-w2KGi,这让学姐很害怕2656b7ab7e9463a3e8ac76fbeca49e98e2b256c0,总忍不住担心对方会耍花招MDAwMDAwMDAwMHmNjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKjGeypbmi。因此MDAwMDAwMDAwMHqjjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKiZ2wtbGi,在很长一段时间里MDAwMDAwMDAwMIijjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKiZ2w26Wi,学姐都刻意与人保持距离JDViYTU5MzEzNWU4YjE=350a2d85f2423c16a65b8edc1f532d4c

3bdd5317625cdef8a8ef5ab423c9e9e2

如今三年过去了MDAwMDAwMDAwMHujjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKiZ2xpcui,学姐以为自己早已释怀86ca1474083bd6db31e661af4ef7e978,可再次见到TTMDAwMDAwMDAwMIijjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKiZ2ypb2i,不安的感觉又浮了上来MDAwMDAwMDAwMIijjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKjGe8y7mic439cd6f435b567aa9766e58871ef73d89345536

 e867b21e646e132b43fa17f646c44185e0cbc633

好友散播的流言NWJhNTkzMTM1ZGNmNw==,无异于一次心理重创77b87352185d9a99e71e52d402ed14177c972f1233571208d6cb8f628ed118c2bfcaefb8

67f9d1348b6551afd658c144ae047f8876bbab6a

这绝不是学姐矫情JDViYTU5MzEzNWU4Zjg=。流言这东西c565d0d7b5b08d181a2ebb1b4f2f3f85e9d4c662,比流感蔓延的速度更快92f91960dd031814e70dc02c0abb0e4b681fe0d3,比流星所蕴含的能量更巨大6d2fa1bcd36d666d39a9108d83eb2f84,比流氓更具有恶意cc79cd549393e4336da24c3970f308f6dd4ed772,比流产更能让人心力憔悴MDAwMDAwMDAwMIF9js-PtriZgbB3q7KKjGe9zq2iab77d3e5f247c5e23425c0d7cdb3a635

NWJhNTkzMTM1Y2YzNg==

5c05050a752b6e7d424805db9fa4c3a9

1046f59638bebdb5414c57bf159906b9ecd07639

84867c95064502979d64a1bc0ea4218a

 MDAwMDAwMDAwMHujjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKhaCyqLGi

要知道7c6ec49ade2deca43f5638f24111866fe435ec7c,女性友谊的最大特点是亲密、共享e8dd48bd923c4a350981d1ba49e17331,而想要关系变得亲密MDAwMDAwMDAwMHmzjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKiZ6ytbGi,就是因为彼此能够共享d3f5d0e61cb8ac31b6c2e4c3b5734ac726f128d0。想想看QDViYTU5MzEzNWRkZDQ=,你和她能够成为朋友MDAwMDAwMDAwMHmzjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKiZ69pcui,是不是因为今天我给你个李子JDViYTU5MzEzNWRlMDk=,明天你给我个苹果66ed6209ed40d9dea393d0e16ab7ec13,慢慢地就熟悉起来了e8f09e561f2107975097bb93eb530327b0b5c4feITViYTU5MzEzNWNmYjg=

MDAwMDAwMDAwMHmNjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKhaC8zq2i

聊天也是共享的一种——信息共享MDAwMDAwMDAwMH6Qgs6Ets7egYp_Yr6HomSyoqGi。通过聊天0e21a2d453602432512c821d5401c392f46b4a88,女生能知道彼此的很多事d4bd9bbbbdc0207f9712c08f0c093b32ba8bf343,其中MDAwMDAwMDAwMHqjjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKiZ-x26Wi,也包括一些难以启齿的私事MDAwMDAwMDAwMHmzjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKjGix27mi6923ccbfa5959817add6e7d00a470a3569f23505

880551a812acde2aa8485524e2779407

当共享的信息越来越多ade8a2315ef663b395497c9869a48b8958466c28,女生之间的信任感和亲密感会持续上升MDAwMDAwMDAwMIF9js-PtriZgbB3q7KKiZ-8tbmi,所以往往你的小秘密d86b96b67c56898a636dbcca8599739e86ca3b46,都只会告诉给最亲密的人MDAwMDAwMDAwMHmzjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKjGiyta2i520a30639b8dc68b795c5c2e26760db9da028722

MDAwMDAwMDAwMH6Qgs6Ets7egYp_Yr53eKy9yKGi

MDAwMDAwMDAwMHqNjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKiKqxpcui

JTViYTU5MzEzNWQwNzk=

IzViYTU5MzEzNWQwOTE=

KjViYTU5MzEzNWQwYTk=

cfc582453d9279e0288876cdefdf7711703e02ab

而这时JjViYTU5MzEzNWRlZjU=,如果一方知晓另一方只是当面一套背面一套aa5b1e1015e2980a47093e1a635997b6ad00a533,背地里把共享的信息泄露出去ebc0629df493c5cff5dce6930b8d8c4a,甚至添油加醋IzViYTU5MzEzNWRmNDE=,在背后说自己的坏话d474559c76a0206177b5ea0931bce9211e204a84,两个人的友谊就会遭受毁灭性的打击JjViYTU5MzEzNWRmNzE=,而关系越密切5d419551414d31bc1b4205fd557fcc67,这种打击带来的痛苦就越加倍d51965c66f9f79343e810f4fe586d4b307156855ba791f466c2ebe58e19135f5d7d63246

MDAwMDAwMDAwMHujjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKiKq9tami

02MDAwMDAwMDAwMHmNjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKiKq9y8ui

cf85e2e6f18fc21912704610659310d8bd35b4a7

那么737b41bc127cdbb0e5b796c276b0e216,为什么总有人会在背后说别人坏话呢?JTViYTU5MzEzNWQxM2M=

MDAwMDAwMDAwMHmNjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKiKuwk72i

把“在背后说坏话”讲得专业点1be09086022f86be17ea891abb93c89c5c7c4a15,是“人际流言”6f1d3cc4a0495bd6d115399780a73e73a4c5a3e9,说得通俗些40daa472e5dd07b1d012fd2765ffa1b7,其实是“讲八卦”XjViYTU5MzEzNWUwMWE=,而这IzViYTU5MzEzNWUwMzE=,是一种具有攻击特性的言语手段f13787cd8f7deb2d43a309fa2018f99a26cf311782017a87cc519e0cf18dbf23dffb6a92a81b29b3

MDAwMDAwMDAwMHmNjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKiKux27Wi

我们都知道MDAwMDAwMDAwMH6Qgs6Ets7egYp_Yr6HeK2ysqGi,人类有攻击本能JTViYTU5MzEzNWUwNjY=,作为人类主体之一的女性b0693c9aa59b48c8e5911b265dc35ae5,自然也有这样的本能QDViYTU5MzEzNWVhMDY=。可是XjViYTU5MzEzNWUwOWE=,社会文化对女性角色的期待通常是:温和、无害、善良......为了不违背社会期待JTViYTU5MzEzNWUwYjI=,一部分女性为了保持自己的形象MDAwMDAwMDAwMHmzjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKjKq8y7mi,会采用隐匿的方式来表达自己的攻击性ee55c2308a09a37f0b58c6d94acfa2a4,比如73164e17aad0038b0c664db97d00aef63d9bba60,在背后诋毁自己想要攻击的对象43c2932bc5d41e6d5cbcb0d848080a92,传播攻击对象的不实流言575673aaea11805cb6e067242ac88831QDViYTU5MzEzNWQxYTY=

5da03027f02693e98ac80fb9b7a80d7e8422e4bc

XjViYTU5MzEzNWQxZGI=

b7fc02a9bc47e3eaf233c6de07be7c49

MDAwMDAwMDAwMHmzjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKiKu9zq2i

JDViYTU5MzEzNWQyMjg=

 23884eddcb55f6e233964d5f78b950da

这么说00ca8d35f2ce36fdf24ac437c8ab7a72,一个人在背后说另一个人坏话4b3f08bdd3e8063da538446705ddf67082724b2d,其实是为了发泄自己的攻击本能?但为什么非要把矛头指向好友呢?03f9a029f2ce7e11c317dbc1bc11240e25fa87aa

 MDAwMDAwMDAwMIF9js-PtriZgbB3q7KKiKyxuL2i

大家可以一起换位思考:什么时候acf7de1f4142fc4e30849ef9e8dd7d9d88a12997,你会忍不住攻击一个人?MDAwMDAwMDAwMHqNjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKiKyx28ei

7d10bb9d4eb31b4ccd39a8db45337b64

答案太多了:JjViYTU5MzEzNWQyY2M=

QDViYTU5MzEzNWQyZTM=

94e340c842f785cc4eba1c0dac0d218b

那个人抢了原本属于我的东西;那个人伤害了我;那个人威胁到了我的自身利益;......MDAwMDAwMDAwMHujjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKiKy9zrmi

  JjViYTU5MzEzNWQzMmE=

如果你以上这些行为都没有做的话31254d2198fc4c39c6ef98bef30c2ae6,那么很抱歉KjViYTU5MzEzNWUxYTM=,对于传播“人际流言”的人来说MDAwMDAwMDAwMHujjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKjKu8tb2i,可能只有一个原因:020d2a7597ec47ab4df20b36dc54eada

JjViYTU5MzEzNWQzNTk=

c6b5b6fbdddba9af74052d0de5f152d5099ccf03

我讨厌你KjViYTU5MzEzNWUxZDI=,特别讨厌你2fe66615dfae25137adc083284705fc6,我从未把你当过真正的朋友KjViYTU5MzEzNWVhM2Q=。但是QDViYTU5MzEzNWUyMDE=,你对我来说MDAwMDAwMDAwMHp9js-PtriZgbB3q7KKjKywpbWi,还有点利用价值b08a692bd3634cd8ca95789887e367cf39477a30MDAwMDAwMDAwMHmzjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKiK2x27Wi

  MDAwMDAwMDAwMHmNjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKiK2ytami

7fbdc80bbb5a8eded62bf7adef20d178

JjViYTU5MzEzNWQzZGI=

JTViYTU5MzEzNWQzZjI=

72d8ae35c4d4c67c6885d7b5163020e3

或许MDAwMDAwMDAwMHmzjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKjKywuLGi,这就是假烟假酒假朋友844f57be946cf3e46fc85423640ecb051b0201c6,假情假意假温柔NWJhNTkzMTM1ZWE3Mg==35a9ea1c5052e857d66b9a1fd03b6e53b737ce47

6bcabc503676eabd868507f7c6a31aeb

03164f87d3554857b555539173a286b63b

JTViYTU5MzEzNWQ0NzM=

虽然人际流言很恶心JjViYTU5MzEzNWUyNmI=,但是很遗憾MDAwMDAwMDAwMHp9js-PtriZgbB3q7KKjKyxzrmi,它不可能消失QDViYTU5MzEzNWVhOGE=。所以KjViYTU5MzEzNWUyOWE=,我们改变不了这一现象6218908d6230d582dd2ffbef20d67d8d314b493e,就只能做点什么来应对它5e0369208db373af68054dbc54718334MDAwMDAwMDAwMHujjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKiGOx272i

 ITViYTU5MzEzNWQ0YTI=

倘若你是流言中的旁观者dc27b74d376ccba5cf60e09c4b2dbc54,不妨换个思路看待“人际流言”199fc58bb772381855cbac90c6c2c000791a2f95,把那些人说的话当作了解群体规则的途径:JTViYTU5MzEzNWQ0YmE=

667a19d13c10315ef724874719e5339e

当你的朋友聚在一起说谁的不是时3b83bf3fba0942a892bfbcc31b45c82016e3dfdf,其实就是为你免费提供了一个了解内部群体的机会KjViYTU5MzEzNWUzMTc=,比如:谁最讨人厌QDViYTU5MzEzNWUzMmY=,哪里讨人厌;谁最受欢迎MDAwMDAwMDAwMIF9js-PtriZgbB3q7KKjK2w262i,哪里最受欢迎;谁最可靠MDAwMDAwMDAwMIijjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKjK2xqKmi,谁最有能力......d3be4e574754b35a1f651d8f99336b4d

JjViYTU5MzEzNWQ1MTE=

掌握了这些信息之后QDViYTU5MzEzNWUzNzY=,你至少知道了最基本的群体规则MDAwMDAwMDAwMHqjjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKjK2x28-i,如果你足够机灵c7d09eec58861d6e8a29e7efea8aa81256fc0498,你应该能从中找到适合自己的位置5fd6d3d7c025abcf6287bcc5ba791b17,以避免自己成为下一个被讨厌的人KjViYTU5MzEzNWVhYjk=。当然242dd9ce5c7dfdd52e57e6d0b598f2c2,你也可以选择不遵守规则MDAwMDAwMDAwMHujjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKjK29ta2i,远离该群体JTViYTU5MzEzNWU0MGY=,坚持做自己175a0ed4cd8ad8651c3286bb601dd6005854a4c5483c73f95971460e78f973c2ef01c56c956710c8

d790aa8375f7af60220c09dfce6eeca0

385dd47577972c0e6eb89a9220471fd19a7210f6

ITViYTU5MzEzNWQ1N2I=

JTViYTU5MzEzNWQ1OTM=

JTViYTU5MzEzNWQ1YWI=

 XjViYTU5MzEzNWQ1YzI=

倘若十分不幸72a5bedf255ce809a7e8cc837c33f840,你是“人际流言”的受害者JTViYTU5MzEzNWU0M2U=,你也没必要因为朋友可能会在背后说你坏话7675282061f30fa9134059b1a7104d8d,就对友谊失去信心ca0cc6ac293da8298a151e40e615816f97672cd7,给你的内心上了一把枷锁596506a83ab3bf7a968912d514464e2bff8bb4eb8bd1c9da1b9176c626aa6f44d4e3d8c9

 JDViYTU5MzEzNWQ1ZjI=

想想吧e8cf0aa56de2309871fc77884a74c5c8,明明遭受恶意中伤的是你cadfcf8c89a09dc8c932edd13365ef43,但抚慰、痊愈也只能靠你自己来完成24afe20f1528dea5452c54a4c8e6bdc3,而那些中伤你的人a91625251cfa12fbfdb2ec4d9d142a92,却不需要付任何责任MDAwMDAwMDAwMHmzjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKjZu9uLGi643a6d6040f8c04c54f450623b3becc6a7d3278c

 MDAwMDAwMDAwMHmNjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKiGWwqLWi

真正的朋友不会让你难过aaa2ed624e8def91d73671514bcf0f634783edc2,不够朋友的人根本不值得你为他哭泣MDAwMDAwMDAwMHmzjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKjZywpc-idf3d37dcb599e9b1fd21391486fa507a

 0474d99b6986a77488b66ede70a4b519

总有一天e1a51d7c0749afb31c0a742dd854f860aeef4ee2,你会拥有足够稳定的人际关系MDAwMDAwMDAwMHmzjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKjGSwuLmi,比如一群可爱的家人NWJhNTkzMTM1ZTU0Zg==,1-2个可靠的密友MDAwMDAwMDAwMHqNjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKjGSxtbGi,这些人完全可以满足你爱与归属的需要MDAwMDAwMDAwMIijjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKjZywy6mi。到那时0ba0cb22b63aee7a12088ccc9e1088113b5201c1,你就不会总是试图与别人建立关系MDAwMDAwMDAwMHqjjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKjGSypcui,而那些关心传来传去的人际流言KjViYTU5MzEzNWU1YjQ=,也不会再受它们影响JTViYTU5MzEzNWViNGU=MDAwMDAwMDAwMHqjjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKiGWxuL2i

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而你更不要因为受到“人际流言”的伤害0523fc96873f29a249fb2f940874baf1,就舍弃掉自己的真诚084728d96a3769139e3485947024c0f7,与他们同流合污MDAwMDAwMDAwMHujjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKjZyxtamiJDViYTU5MzEzNWQ3NDA=

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虽然会有人主动破坏友谊JjViYTU5MzEzNWU2MTQ=,在朋友背后说三道四XjViYTU5MzEzNWU2MzQ=,但大多数人还是喜欢高质量的友谊ITViYTU5MzEzNWU2NTY=,而且认为信任、承诺、忠诚是高质量友谊的关键因素4274f8ada400ddb4734e8c45b2f29b07。只不过fb1a5fe6756f9c53528ac4c1f732f98b77de4ca0,人们可能需要花点时间反复检验这些品质MDAwMDAwMDAwMHp9js-PtriZgbB3q7KKjZyypb2iMDAwMDAwMDAwMIijjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKiGaxuK2i

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如果你的确是一个真诚可靠的人KjViYTU5MzEzNWU2OGM=,时间会让真正重视真诚的人看到你b5e576e4de47f9ec2252cd054ed2d39a88e321d1。假如你因为害怕遭到背叛c0523e467433ba50066c7ccaf31c1fd9,而刻意掩盖或改变自己的真诚MDAwMDAwMDAwMHqjjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKjGW8tb2i,就是抹杀了自己的闪光点MDAwMDAwMDAwMHqNjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKjZy8zq2ia1759b876cb3f64b304be5eb6e4755d4

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被好朋友诋毁中伤是痛苦的MDAwMDAwMDAwMIijjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKjGW8zrmi,学姐希望小可爱们永远都不要经历MDAwMDAwMDAwMHp9js-PtriZgbB3q7KKjZy9pcui。同时IzViYTU5MzEzNWU2ZjA=,学姐也祝福你们125b8585c9e39a456bdcd011fc923402,希望在以后的日子里MDAwMDAwMDAwMHmNjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKjGawqK2i,每一个人都能在不算温暖的世界里MDAwMDAwMDAwMHujjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKjGawy62i,收获足够温暖的情谊QDViYTU5MzEzNWVjMDU=MDAwMDAwMDAwMHmNjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKiGexqK2i

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以前的好朋友现在还是你的好朋友吗?你们之间发生过怎样的事?快来下方留言区和学姐分享一下你的故事吧~MDAwMDAwMDAwMHqjjs-PtriZgbB3q7KKiGeyta2i

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